Krvavá voda v povodí Labe Tisk
Aktuality - Celý tým
Napsal uživatel Bárt s m.   
Středa, 15 Červen 2016 19:25

Vzhledem k tomu, že nás čeká výjezd na východ, tak se dva úředníci, učitel a skladník rozhodli, že vyrazí už v pátek, aby zkusili krvavou vodu na Labi. V pátek dopoledne si každý z aktérů najde chvilku času ve svém narvaném pracovním dni a vymyslí strategii na odpolední lov.

Zde jsou:
Den dle učitele:
15:45 piju pivo
16:05 piju pivo ve vlaku
16:35 piju pivo ve vlaku
17:15 piju pivo cestou k řece
17:35 nahazujeme a piju pivo
17:47 první záběr
18:00 oslavné pivo, protože to vypadá na krvavou vodu
18:45 pivo na žal, protože krvavá voda se nekoná
19:30 buřt a pivo
začínám ztrácet pojem o čase a o sobě a pořád piju pivo:)

Den dle úředníka č. 1:
10:00 prudím se v práci
11:00 prudím se v práci
11:30 - 12:15 užívám si, protože jím oběd
12:15-14:55 prudím se v práci a koukám na hodinky a čekám na 14:55
14:55 čekám před turniketem
15:00 odcházím z práce a zaduji se
15:10 stojím ve frontě na poště - prudím se
15:25 běžím na olšanské náměstí
15:30 kupuju buřtíky a pivo
15:45 běžím na Hl. N. na vlak
15:55 vlak mi ujíždí
16:00 jsem Vámi spruzen a jdem na pívo
16:55 jedeme vlakem a pijeme to koupené pivo
Následně je to stejné jako u učitele, ale s hodinovým posunem.

Den dle úředníka č. 2:
10:00 sedim v kanclu sám, tak můžu prdět
11:00 pracuju jak hovado, abych mohl v 15:00 vypadnout
12:00 kupuju buřtíky a chleba, víc než 4 piva.
13:00 kontroluju mrazák, jestli mi klucí nemrznou
15:00 vyndavám z mrazáku zmrzlý piva a jdu na hlavák
pak chlastáme
21:00 vytahuju úředníka č. 1 z řeky
22:00 je dopito 12 sviňáků
22:05 objevujeme flašku slivovice
23:00 pereme se nahatý

 

Den dle skladníka:
to před 15:30 uz proste nejak uplyne

15:35 na hlavaku zjistujem, ze pivko nestihame a jdem radsi do kupe chlastat uz svoje
15:45 prisedame si do kupe k dvěma pohlednejm slecnam
16:02 uředník č. 1 je v pulce 2. piva a zacina laskovat
16:18 uředník č. 1 dopiji svoje 4. pivo saha první slecne na prsa
16:24 uředník č. 1 si od vaska pujcil 2 piva a saha druhy slecne na prsa
pak cca stejny jako bart
18:30 uz sme fakt chytry, chytli sme 2 cudly a rvem na opodal sedici rybare ze jsou looseri
19:00 rybari nam chtej dat do drzky, vykupujem se par pivama
19:30 uředník č. 1 se koupe
19:45 uředník č. 2 si jde pujcit kanoj

Zde si můžete tipnout, jaká varianta se uskutečnila. Nebo se stalo úplně něco jiného?
Abych měl klid, tak zde ještě zmíním, že úředník č. 2 chytil sumce jak hovado.
Sobotní probuzení na seně u pana tchána úředníka č. 1 je celkem pohodové. Po snídani vyrážíme směr Klášterec nad Ohří a v plánu je vyplenit Orlici na místě, které vybral skladník. Na cestu dostáváme věnec buřtů a v nejbližší šopu si kupujeme životabudiče – pivo Kanec a úředník č.1, který je brblajícím šoférem, kupuje limču. Přijíždíme do neznáme vesnice a skladník se jen rozplývá, že k vodě je to kousek. Vyrážíme. Jdeme, jdeme, jdeme, jdeme a řeku pořád nevidíme. Jdeme, jdeme, jdeme úředníka č. 1 začíná bolet kotník. Jdeme, jdeme, jdeme a už vidíme řeku. Jdeme k řece, ale nejde zde chytat. Jdeme, jdeme, jdeme, jdeme. Skladní jde na konci, protože už ho nebaví poslouchat brblání státních zaměstnanců. Jsme na místě. Místo super na kempování, ohniště, lavičky, stůl, jen ryby tu nejsou. Pečeme buřty, lehce popíjíme a začínají jezdit vodáci. Těšíme se, že bude hezky a budou jezdi holky do půl těla. Po několika lodích jsme rádi, že je zima a vodačky jsou v oblečené. Úředník č. 1 vytahuje monstrozní Rutilus rutilus, která putuje na oheň a následně do našich žaludků. Čas se krátí, balíme zbytek buřtů a jdeme k autu, které máme v jiném okrese. Úředník č. 2 nechytil nic.
Do Kostelce je to co by kamenem dohodil (snad blíž než o místa chytání k našemu modrému žihadlu), nicméně skladník nevydržel naše mrmlání a proto potřebuje zastávku na WC.
Jsme na místě. Rozcvičení. Zahájení zápasu. Suplující trenér Vlčák vymýšlí sázku, že kdo nebude mít pálku lepší než 250 půjde do Orlice. První zápas hrajeme asi nejlíp co jsme letos hráli. Pole dobrý, pálka dobrá, prostě dobrý. Zápas vyhráváme a tím máme splněno. V Orlici je zatím namočený Bárt s v. Chceme vyhrát i druhý zápas, ale předvádíme naší klasickou PV hru po vyhraném zápasu. Kvalita našeho výkonu se rovná výkonů pánů v modrém. Prohráváme. Během konce zápasu se dozvídáme, že není ve stánku pivo. Do Orlice nakonec šel Vlčák a Bárt s v. (Bartůňku už sis našel tůňku?).
Odjezd do Pardubic je naštěstí veselý, protože skladník zjistil, že u Orlice je kiosek s občerstvením. Vzhledem k tomu, že šofér nás vede zkratkou přes cyklostezku plnou výmolů, tak část občerstvení končí na zemi a sedačkách modrého žihadla. Dožadujeme se zastávky, abychom mohli doplnit rozlité tekutiny, ale všechny naše prosby a argumenty nejsou vyslyšeny. Jsme v Pardubicích.
Ubytována a následně přesun do čínské restaurace Bílý Koníček. Someliér Kopito se už těší na švestkové víno. Dáme pivo, víno, jídlo, pivo, víno, pivo, víno, pivo atd. a vedeme důležité hovory o kultuře, politice, hospodářství, sportu, módě atd. Bohužel se to nedá moc publikovat. Snad jen to, že kromě someliérství je Kopito dobrý i v instalatéřině, konkrétně při práci s topením. Odcházíme z restaurace……….

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